Fighting for Singleship: I am Chased by a Bunch of Women But I Just Want to Play Video Games

Finish your first run.

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Look for someone who is peeking through the window in the game menu.

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Wait for the women guards to leave their post and try to escape using the raft.

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Run over and break all the alcohol bottles on the floor in a single run.

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Find and break the cage that keeps the monkey in captivity.

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Find where the monkey is hiding.

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Help the monkey and escape from the pirates and the rest of the women on the ship.

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Break the clothes line.

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Here is a riddle for you: "In pixels I reside, yet a glimpse beyond my frame, seek the screen within, where a future game takes aim".

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Open a reward chest that will give you extra points.

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Open a reward chest that will heal your wounds.

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Unlock the second level.

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Open a "reward" chest that will troll you and deal some damage to you.

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Open all the reward chests on the map in a single run.

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Upgrade your movement speed to max (3/3).

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Upgrade your maximum health to max (3/3).

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Upgrade your damage dealt to max (3/3).

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Find and use a boon chest to heal yourself.

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Stop 20 crabs from attacking you.

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Make at least 1000 points in a single run.

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Make at least 2000 points in a single run.

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Make at least 5000 points in a single run.

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Unlock the third level.

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Make at least 10000 points in a single run.

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Make at least 20000 points in a single run.

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Make at least 30000 points in a single run.

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Make at least 40000 points in a single run.

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Make at least 50000 points in a single run.

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Earn a better score than the last player on the online leaderboard.

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Populate the entire level1 local leaderboard spots.

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Populate the entire level2 local leaderboard spots.

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Populate the entire level3 local leaderboard spots.

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Escape close death by healing your wounds when you health is below 10.

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Imobilize 100 women in a single run.

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Avoid getting hit with flowers during an entire run.

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Avoid getting hit with wine bottles during an entire run.

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Avoid getting hit by rocks during an entire run.

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Try not to get caught in under 2 minutes, nerd.

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Do not get caught in less than 5 minutes.

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Do not get caught in less than 10 minutes.

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Can you survive for more than 15 minutes out there?

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Watch any cutscene from the Story Recap menu.

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Read not so closely how to play the game.

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Land 50 hits without imobilizing the unhinged admirers.

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Imobilize 500 women in a single run.

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Make at least 100000 points in a single run.

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Imobilize 1000 women in a single run.

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Imobilize 100 pirates in a single run.

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Imobilize 500 pirates in a single run.

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Imobilize 1000 pirates in a single run.

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